Things that have made me happy this week

Sunday, 28 January 2018



The past few weeks haven't been the best for me, it seems like everything is going wrong! But I think it's important to remember there's still things to happy about.

1. It's getting noticeably lighter.

It feels like the winter solstice was forever ago but it finally seems like it is starting to get a bit lighter. Like most people I leave for work when it's dark and don't get home until it's properly dark again. It can get very depressing and I get quite frustrated that I spend all my daylight hours in an office. But I've noticed that it's no longer completely pitch black when I leave work.

Summer is creeping a bit closer every day!

2. Cadbury's hot chocolate.

I had forgotten how amazing this is with real milk. I've had a few mugs of this in the evening recently when it's been cold and miserable outside. I haven't had it for years and it always cheers me up. It's so much richer and creamier than the stuff you make with boiling water. A swirl of salted caramel added to it makes it even nicer ;)

3. Our cat.

Every morning when I get up she's waiting outside my door ready to come and get into bed with me for cuddles. I look forward to it every day.

She wasn't very well before Christmas and it made me so sad to see her looking so unhappy and ill. I'm so glad she seems to have recovered and is back to her old self.

4. My part time studying is going well.

I'm currently studying part time alongside working and it's been going well this week. I'm nearly halfway through the course. I'm actually ahead of schedule at the moment which is nice because it makes me feel like I have enough time to take things at the pace I need to. 

Going back to studying after a break is tricky, particularly as I've never studied this sort of material before. 

Now I need to keep the momentum going!

5. Cookie dough.

Over Christmas I made two batches of chocolate orange cookies and froze them ready for when I had a cookie craving. 

I was feeling a little low and craving something sweet so I dug these out of the freezer.
They were so so good and they were ready in 15 minutes. I'm glad I've still got the other batch ready for when I need another cookie hit...

Is there anything that has made you happy this week? It's always good to try and appreciate the little things!

2018 Goals

Monday, 1 January 2018



As I mentioned in my previous post, 2017 has been an amazing year and I've achieved so much more than I thought I could when I made my 2017 goals.

I didn't manage all of them, but some of them I smashed out of the park so that makes up for it ;)

Money Goals

1. Replenish our savings

As I'm sure you can imagine buying our house has taken its toll on our savings so this year I want to try and help them recover a bit so we have a more adequate rainy day fund. 

2. Repay Kiera

My sister very kindly lent me some money to buy my new carriage when I had none. I have paid her back more than half now but this year I want the debt to be finally wiped out. 

3. Save enough for some sort of mini break

We might manage this or we might not as we have other priorities for our money but it would be good if we could manage a weekend away somewhere this year. 

Travel

4. Visit Rome

This was actually one of my 2016 goals and this year we are definitely making it happen because it's all already booked! 

Jared and I are going to Rome in late April for our five year anniversary. 

I've always wanted to go back and explore more and I'm really excited about it. Jared's Mum very kindly bought me a guide book for Christmas so looking forward to putting that to good use.

5.  Visit more local attractions on our doorstep

We made a good start on this in 2017 but there are lots more places to see in the immediate area that we live in. I want to make an effort to visit these before we head further afield. 

Development

6. Pass my first financial exam

This is a big one for me this year as I am back to studying. I am officially a student again and have a NUS card to prove it. 

I am sitting my first CII qualification and have started studying for the first module. I am aiming to pass this as soon as possible so hopefully I can get back to studying in the New Year.

Blogging

7. Sort out my domain name

I have actually owned the domain name for this blog for years but because I'm not very good with computers I haven't managed to successfully set it up.

This year I want to get this sorted as I think it will make my blog a little nicer, plus I am currently paying for something I'm not using which is daft.

8. Create some categories

I want to change the layout of my blog a little and make it easier to navigate. As I'm not the most tech savvy person in the world I'm not sure if I'll be able to manage this but I want to give it a go!

Home and Lifestyle

9. Spruce up the outside of the house

Now that we have redecorated the inside of our house, I want to give a bit of attention to the exterior. 

Our windows and fascias need repainting and I'd like to improve the garden a bit.

I've thought of a few small and easily achievable ideas that I'd like to try, more on that at a later date!

10. Grow more stuff

I've always loved growing things and I spend many happy hours in the garden with my mum and grandmothers as a child. 

As I've got older I always try and grow something at home, but I'm always a bit half hearted with it. 

Now that Jared and I have our own house I want to try and grow a few new things I haven't tried before. Thanks to Cider With Rosie for sharing her veg growing excitement and inspiring me to continue with my old lady hobbies ;)

Life Update - We bought a house!

Wednesday, 20 September 2017



So I know this is a random time of night to write a blog post, but it has been one heck of a day!

I think this might be the biggest news I've ever been able to share... Jared and I have just bought our first house together!

I'm so proud of our achievement and that we managed it all by ourselves. It's taken a lot of saving and dedication but it was worth it in the end!


We first found out about the house back in March and went to view it in April, so it's been over six months from the first steps to getting the keys. It's been a long and a difficult road that at times has seemed impossible.

I'll write details in further posts but for now I just wanted to share our exciting news!

Buying a home has been top of my goals for a long time and I can't believe that we have actually done it.

Right now life is a bit hectic and we are frantically sorting things out, so I'll keep this post short and sweet.

Once things are more settled I'll share more info, but for now I've got packing to do!

Life After Graduation - Why working at uni was great for my career

Sunday, 3 September 2017

To finish off my blog series on Life After Graduation this is a post for those of you who are still at uni and are starting to realise that one day soon, you too will graduate and join The Real World. It's also for those of you who have just graduated and don't realise that the job you worked at uni could well be the springboard to launch your future career from.

As I've mentioned in my previous posts I worked throughout my time at uni, but I actually got my first job at 16 waitressing. I didn't do it for very long and I wasn't that great at it, but it was a valuable start to the world of work.

When I first went to uni I spent my holidays working at a local riding stables which did carriage rides at Center Parcs. I got the job because of my experience with carriage driving and it suited me pretty well. The hours were long, the weather was rubbish (anyone who has ever set foot in Center Parcs at Longleat in the winter will tell you that it is extremely cold there) and like all jobs working with horses, it was hard work. Their busiest season was Christmas where I spent most of my time dressed as an elf. Yep an actual elf, or occasionally making a brief appearance as Santa. The kids absolutely loved it and they ALL always called me 'Mrs Elf' unprompted by anyone. Where do they learn to do this? I felt like the Trunchball from Matilda and wanted to scream, why is this elf married?!! My family like to remind me of it a lot.

But do you know what? Although the pay wasn't amazing (not to mention the extremely glamorous outfit), the long hours meant I wracked up enough money to make it worth my while. The hours were flexible and they mostly needed me during the weekends and holidays which suited me perfectly. So although it wasn't the dream job it paid enough to get by.

I used the experience to gain my next job which I worked at for the final two years of my degree (which included my masters year). The hours were still flexible, the pay was better but the job was harder work.

Holding down my job and doing my degree at the same time taught me some valuable lessons and gave me FAR MORE experience than anything I ever did during my four years at uni.

So if you're at uni now, my advise would be to seriously consider getting a job. If you've left uni and you had a job while you were there then these are the reasons you can use to work it to your advantage to find your first role after you graduate.

1.  You have to learn to balance your priorities

I usually worked 16 hours a week for my final two years at uni, which consisted of two 8 hours shifts on the weekend. I switched between working early and late shifts. Some months I did more hours, some months less depending on what was going on.

I can already hear the chorus of students claiming they don't have time for that. Now fair enough if you're studying a contact heavy subject at a hardcore uni (I'm talking medicine at Oxbridge) then maybe you don't have time. But if like the rest of us you have a chunk of free time in your week (yes that includes weekends) then you do have time.

Before anyone comments that I did a doss subject at a crap uni let me fill you in on my degree. I did an integrated masters at the University of Southampton in Geology and graduated with a 2:1. Jared did the same in Marine Biology and worked roughly the same amount of hours as me and got a first. Southampton's Ocean and Earth Science department is one of the very best in the UK (not to mention the entire world) and is a leading research institution that sets very high standards for its students. I had around 25 hours of contact time per week throughout my degree but as standard my friends and I were at uni from 9-5. Plus an hour each way commute as our campus is the other side of the city. I'm not trying to make myself sound like the most accomplished person ever (I'm very far from it), but I just want to prove that it is possible for a lot of students at uni to work and study at the same time.

But you do have to be organised and prepared to work hard, play hard. If you've got a deadline coming up on Monday and you're working this weekend then you'll have to get the essay done by Friday. If you've got a social event coming up and you're working then you'll have to get your deadlines done AND arrange your shifts so that you can do all of it. 

Why is this important? Because it's preparing you for the real world where work is non negotiable and has to be prioritised else you will no longer have a job. You can't decide you're not working because there's a party you want to go to, or because you're too tired today. You have to roll up your sleeves and get it done.

If you can manage doing this at uni, then you'll find a 'grown up job' a walk in the park.

2. Working isn't so hard after all

Is it just me or when you were a kid and you saw adults on TV working you just thought that they magically knew how to be a secretary or an accountant? You saw the adults around you doing their adult jobs and thought quietly to yourself 'but I don't know how to do that', it must be something you learn when you grow up'.

Well you're at uni, you are a grown up. The secret truth is that for a lot of people, working is not as hard as being at uni. At uni you are expected to direct your own learning with minimal support. Sure you have a tutor who you either haven't seen since your first semester as a fresher or doesn't even know who you are. Your lecturers throw around complex terms and if you don't understand a concept you have to figure it out on your own or you'll fall behind. 

Work is different. For a lot of roles you will receive on the job training and will likely be mentored to someone who will teach you. At first it will seem complex and scary but few entry level jobs are. That's why they're entry level. Once you've been doing it a little while you will soon get to grips with it. I find is so strange that so many people my age are desperate to 'stay in education forever because the real world is scary'. Of course it is, all change is scary. But it'll be scary for a few weeks tops and then you'll be ok. It really isn't so bad after all. If you can get over that and realise that you can learn a job just like every other grown up in the world while you're still at uni, you won't be paralysed with the fear of the unknown that grips so many graduates. You'll be the one grabbing a new opportunity because you're fairly certain you'll figure it out.

3. Keeping your finances healthy

Being a student is basically another way of saying you're poor. Even if your parents help you out chances are you still have just enough to get by. I'm from a low income background so I qualified for the maximum grant/loan but even that is only around £7,000 a year. When your rent plus bills (in a small, very reasonably priced but nice-ish for student standards shared house in Southampton) is £4,800 a year it doesn't leave you much to live on. My parents could not in anyway afford to support me so having a job was essential if I wanted to have enough money to live on, let alone do fun things, like everyone else.

I wasn't as financially disciplined then as I am now and anything I earnt that was extra to what I needed to live off I spent on fun things. Mostly holidays, but also compulsory field trips as our living costs weren't covered by the uni or sometimes the trip itself was only partially paid for and we had to cough up the rest. For example, my six week mapping trip to the Isle of Skye which we only had a £500 contribution towards. Our accommodation alone cost £600 and we had to cover all the additional kit, travel and living costs ourselves. I bought a £200 pair of walking boots for this trip on the advice of my mapping supervisor and it was some of the best money I've ever spent. Everyone else had wet feet for the whole six weeks and mine were warm and dry. I could never have afforded that without my job. I had to work some extra shifts to earn them but it was worth the small amount of effort for six weeks of comfort. Plus I still have them now.

Even though I spent most of the money I earned, having a job crucially stopped me having to rely on an overdraft. My friends mocked me because they told me an overdraft was 'free money' which you don't have to pay back until after you graduate. I'm so glad I ignored them and refused to ask my bank for one. A year after graduating I know so many graduates who are no closer to paying off their overdrafts than when they wracked up the debt in the first place.

Even for those that have a job, their pay cheque often only takes them to £0 each month and then all the money they spend waiting for their next pay day just sinks them back into the depths of their overdraft. In short, overdrafts are really hard to climb out of. And the bank don't let you have that overdraft for free forever. As soon as you graduate the clock is ticking for when you have to pay it back, and overdraft charges can soon start to mount up making it even harder to claw your way out.

Having a job at uni kept me debt free (besides my student loans of course, but they're not the same kind of debt) for four years. When I graduated I actually had some savings (as I had been too busy with work and uni to spend as much money) which I spent on this year's trip to Norway.

On top of that, earning your own money makes you really think about how much things cost. When I wanted those walking boots all I could think about was how many shifts I would need to do to earn them and whether or not it was worth it. In that case it absolutely was, but I shudder to think now at how much money I've wasted on crap clothes I don't wear anymore over the years.

When you start looking at a top in terms of 'I'll have to work this many hours to afford it' it gets a lot easier to put it back on the rail. Learning to do that is the secret to financial success for the rest of your life. 

4. Gaining new skills

This is probably the most important one of all. For one thing if you've already held down a job before you REALLY need one in the big wide world, you're already a better bet to an employer with a shed load of CV's from graduates that are hard to separate by their academic ability alone.

You've already proved you're reliable by holding down the job for whatever period of time. You've also proved that you're hard working. I've never had an interviewer fail to be impressed that I held down a job and studied for my masters degree at the same time. But mostly you've proved that you're determined enough to do what it takes to get the job done.

As I mentioned above, working alongside studying does not come without a certain amount of sacrifice. You can't go on every single night out. You can't always see your friends at the weekend because you're working. But employers don't care about your social life (much). They will be impressed you were strong enough to prioritise working over partying and lazing about watching Netflix marathons with your mates.  It shows a certain amount of resourcefulness that you were able to juggle all the balls without dropping them, because you found a way.

On top of that are the skills you gained within your actual role. Perhaps you worked in a customer service role and have handled irate customers and solved their complaints. Maybe you answered the phone and can talk to people calmly and professionally (essential for almost all roles and a skill a lot of people our age lack thanks to our love of texting). Perhaps your work involved helping others and your empathy shines through when you talk about it. One friend of mine worked at McDonalds. A job many people would consider to be shameful to put on your CV. She didn't think so though, she always talked about how she was in a leadership position and her job was to train new members of staff. She emphasized the importance of food safety and ensuring that all of her staff adhered to this. Funnily enough she found a job straight out of uni. 

5. Confidence in yourself

There is something to be said for knowing you can do something well. Once you've been working somewhere a while and you know the ropes it can be an enormous boost for your confidence. A problem comes up and you know how to solve it because you've handled it before. Or you know who to ask to help you sort it out. You handle a tricky client's complaint and get it fixed for them. You go home at the end of your shift knowing your hard work made a small, but positive difference to someone's life.

This confidence that you know how to handle a real life job starts to bleed into other areas of your life. Handling new software at uni? Ok it'll be difficult to start with but you'll get to grips with it. Doing group work with someone who is notoriously lazy? No problem, they can't be any more challenging than so-and-so that you work with. 

But when this all really comes into its own is when you graduate. Your pals are all running around like headless chickens at the mere thought of getting a job, while you are calmly browsing Indeed for something you reckon you can do. If your friends were honest they would tell you the thought of getting a job scares them because the unknown is frightening. If they were brave enough to tell you that, you could reassure them that you know it's scary, but they will soon adapt and you know this because you've done it before. 

In summary, some of us have to work while we're at uni just to make ends meet. I was definitely in that category but I wanted some money to spend on fun things (mostly trips abroad) so I worked harder than I needed to just to get by. But for those of you who don't need the cash, you should still seriously consider getting a job while you're at uni. Even if it's only in the holidays (temping is great for this). There's a lot more to be gained than money. 

Did you work while you were at uni? Or are you thinking perhaps you should? Let me know your experience!

Life After Graduation Blog Series




Post 4: Coping with life after leaving uni 

Shout out to my fabulous Geology Girls who made my years at uni so much fun. #TeamSirens

Looking ahead to the New Year 2017

Sunday, 1 January 2017

2016 according to most (or at least the people I follow on social media) has been an awful year.
My timeline on every channel is full of 'Good riddance 2016' type posts and statuses.

However I'm feeling sad that this year is over. While it's been challenging it's also been one of the best years yet for me.

I started 2016 feeling stressed, anxious and panicked and as we begin the New Year a lot has changed for me. I made 8 goals back at the beginning of 2016 and I've surprised myself by achieving most of them.

I've completed my masters project and received a mark I'm really proud of. My bound copy of it now proudly sits on my bookshelf along with my 3rd year mapping project as a constant reminder that although it seemed impossible at the time, I still managed it.

2016 also saw me graduating from the University of Southampton with a 2:1 MSci in Geology. It only seems a few moments ago I went to look round the campus for the first time and now I have finished my masters degree. My 3rd year at uni was tough for me and I struggled all the way through my final year feeling like I wasn't good enough and that I didn't deserve a place on the course.  But I proved everyone wrong and I think it is fair to say that I am really proud of myself.

My plans for life post graduation were fairly simple. Move home, get a job and then regroup from there. What I didn't expect was to be made redundant from my job (along with the rest of the team)  just weeks before I graduated. I hadn't even received my degree certificate yet and I was already being made redundant. Not the plan I had in mind.

I signed up to a temping agency and a few days later they contacted me asking if I could start a temping job in 3 days time. I had no idea what I was letting myself in for but I said yes. 3 weeks of temping later and the company offered me a full time role with them. It turned out that finding a job post uni was not as hard or as scary as I had feared. Now I am settled into my full time job and have learnt a huge amount about the new industry I am working in.

While all of this happened without as much difficulty as I had feared it has been a huge period of change in my life. On top of that my family dynamic has changed massively. When I graduated and moved home my parents also invited Jared to move back home with me so that we can try and get our own place together. I absolutely love him living here and how well he gets on with everyone, although it was a big change to get used to. We now have to share quite a small space together but coming home every day and getting to spend time with him is just the best.

Looking ahead to 2017 I want to make some new goals to help challenge and focus me throughout the coming year. I didn't achieve all of my goals in 2016 and some of them I have put on hold for a while, but hopefully the New Year will be as good as the last.

Money Goals:
1. Reach my saving goal for our house deposit. This is the biggest goal for the year, Jared and I are trying to save enough money and while we have made a pretty good start already the next 12 months are crucial if we want to stay on target. Money is tight for me while I'm saving so its going to have to be quite a frugal year but having a house of our own has got to be worth a few years of scrimping.

2. Pay into my pension. Now that I work for a pension company I feel I actually understand what a pension is now. Don't laugh I know most of us have no clue either. The one thing I have had impressed upon me is the importance of small but regular contributions throughout your life. Over the course of a working lifetime it can really add up but the key is to start right away, not leave it until you're older. Although as I've previously said I could really do with the extra money I am trying to look at it as additional saving that I am doing for my future.

3. Donate to some charities that mean something to me. While I have been at uni (without the reliability of a steady wage) I have not been as generous as I would like to be with my money. This year I would like to choose three charities and make a small donation. Not because someone is waving a collection tin in my face, but because I think their cause is worth helping. Sometime we can feel pressured by others into donating and I would like to take the time to support charities that matter to me, as well as those that matter to other people.

Travel Goals:
4. Visit Norway. Going to Scandinavia has been high on my bucket list for ever. This year we are going on a cruise to Norway and I cannot wait! Luckily this was already paid for by working overtime from my old job while I was at uni so it shouldn't affect my saving plans.

5. Visit Bath. Considering this is pretty close to me I have only ever been there on a couple of nights out that feel like a lifetime away now. I'd really like to take a day trip there and actually explore the city. There is no excuse really as it is only an hour away.

6. Visit Ann in Exeter. My best friend is graduating from the University of Exeter this year and I've been trying to go and see her since she was a fresher. Now that I don't have deadlines and exams to fill my weekends I am hoping to make it down there soon!

7. Visit Oxford. On a similar note to Bath this isn't very far from me and I've never visited. I'd like to have a wander about and see what's what. As I haven't got a huge amount of spare cash at the moment a proper European city break is out of the question so I'd like to visit places on my doorstep instead as a compromise.

Development Goals:
8. Read 3 'classic' books. One of my goals from 2016 was to read more and now that I've left uni I am actually relaxed enough to find the time to read. I've always been someone that reads what I enjoy, not necessarily what challenges me. There are so many books that I should have read but haven't got round to it. So I'm going to start small with some of the books many people read at GCSE (Animal Farm anyone?) that my school didn't cover.

9. Practise my German. Since I've left school the amount I've forgotten is shocking. I was by no means fluent (lol) but I could get by on trips to Germany and Austria (where is the toilet, how much is this etc). I want to get my butt back on Duolingo and get practicing again.

10. Become competent in all processes at work. As I've only been working there for a few months there is still a lot of stuff I don't know how to do. Over the next 12 months I'm hoping to learn new things and keep improving.

We'll see this time next year how many I've managed!

When is the right time to do something?

Thursday, 21 May 2015

Now I'm in my third year at uni this question surrounds me constantly. I'm no longer a carefree freshers who's major concern is working out how much I can drink and still make it to my 9am lecture. And its not just me, its my friends too. We're no longer stressing about how we're going to do all the things we want but rather WHEN is the right time to do them.

I know one day I want to explore the world a bit more. But when should I do it? Do I get it all out the way in a year long trip after I graduate? Sounds amazing but I have no money to do that, so I guess I need to get a job. But once I have a job heading off on such an adventure would probably ruin my career. So just how am I going to make this dream work?

Another major goal of mine is to one day own a house. I've lived in rented housing for three years now and I don't see that situation changing anytime soon. Its ok, but I would like to have something that is actually mine. I want to be able to do things as simple as change the wall colour or hang a picture without having to ask first. But most of all I want to feel settled somewhere, to create my own home and to feel it is my own personal sanctuary. I'm desperate to unleash that nesting urge women seem to have and put my own personal stamp onto something. So I guess I am going to have to get a job and save damn hard if I want to make this one work. But when is the right time to actually say you want to put some roots down and start building your life?

Most difficult of all when is the right time to have children? If I'm being honest this is my only major life goal I have. But ask anyone and they all have different opinions on whens the right time in your life to embrace this enormous change and responsibility. I've got friends who already have children and those that are shocked at the thought of having kids before they are 30. I think I'm probably somewhere in the middle of those two but even so I have no idea if or when there will ever be a time when I'm ready. I don't think its fair to have children if you are not able to support them. But will I ever get to that stage before the biological clock has stopped altogether? With a family history of early onset menopause it is definitely something I need to be thinking about.

These worries keep me up at night sometimes. This is the big stuff that I actually really want. And it scares me that I have no idea if its even possible to achieve all of it. And because its what I want I think its worth giving it some thought. I'm starting to see that stressing about it endlessly won't help either. I have no idea what the future holds and my current situation might change dramatically. I might win the lottery or get some amazing job that will allow me to afford these things easily. I guess I just need to wait and see what happens and try to ignore the pressure society puts on us to 'have it all figured out'.

Also, in all honesty though I am not sure there is ever a 'right' time to do anything and if you are determined to wait for it then you might never achieve anything. Sometimes you just have to go with it and take the risk. That I guess is the tricky part and the point I am trying to make with this post. You just need to decide if you want it enough to try.

For now, I am going to focus on finishing my 3rd year at uni and going on holiday to Crete. These are all baby steps towards what I want in the long term. The rest of it will just have to work itself out.

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Hey its ok to cut yourself some slack

Thursday, 7 May 2015

The whole reason I write this blog is because I feel its a place I can be honest about how I feel, even if its a small drama getting me down. Like most people I can struggle with my self confidence on occasion. Ive written about it on this blog before and if I'm honest its an ongoing problem.
It feels like it strikes out of nowhere, one moment I'm this cool, sassy, fierce girl whos got her shit together and the next I'm curled up in bed bawling my eyes out about how the world and their mother hate me.

With hindsight I can usually see a negative cycle of behavior that warns of an impending meltdown but this time was different. If you take a look at the previous posts on this that I've linked above you can see its been a while since this has bothered me and I was starting to think I was making real progress with how I see myself.

One tiny little thing bothered and suddenly I was upset beyond any reason. I know we all get days like this, where you feel on the verge of tears about nothing. And if I'm honest it probably was one of 'those days' combined with hormones. But even so I don't normally let it get this out of hand.

This happened last week and its taken me a while to decide what I wanted to write about with it. I think what I learnt from this particular time was that actually its ok to get upset about things. Normally everything looks better after you sleep on it, but this time when I woke up I found I was still beating myself up about it. I got up early and sat by myself with a cup of tea for a bit. I allowed myself to cry and feel all the emotions that go with one of these low moments. I decided to cut myself some slack for not being perfect and I immediately felt better. After an hour or so I had pulled myself back together.

We're only human and we our emotions are not always rational but that's ok. The world would be pretty boring if we all acted in a perfectly predictable way. Everyone has moments of self doubt so we are not alone in how we feel. I'm writing this post to say that I am ok with having the odd moment where I act like a crazy person because I know that everytime I overcome one of these moments I am making more and more progress. All we can ever aim for is to improve.

Doing Life the 'right' way

Sunday, 12 April 2015

So last week I finally finished the book I was reading called I want it that way by Ann Aguirre (free to download on iTunes just FYI) and I have to admit its not often a book stays with me for this long.

Although this is not a post reviewing this book I would definitely recommend it to anyone who enjoys a good raunchy romance story. Its a seriously relateable book and I would would be a good read for anyone in their twenties who is stressing about their overall life plan.

The reason I wanted to write this post is the overriding theme of the book is there is no right way to live life. The book focuses around the idea that we have a predetermined path expected of us by society and it can be tricky to deviate from it. As young adults we feel a huge pressure to get our lives together and to start being a responsible mature adult. Slack on this front and you will feel the full force of everyone's disapproval but this can also happen the other way round. Grow up too quick and people will question if you have made a rash decision or bitten off more than you can chew as you are 'too young to know what you want'.

What I loved about this book was the way it encouraged me to pursue what I want and my own happiness. Life is complicated and the right way for most people may or may not be the right way for YOU. And that is absolutely fine. Only you can know what is right for you and by making that choice you also accept the consequences should it not work out. Having said this people mature at different rates and we should allow for this. You might be 30 and nowhere near ready to settle down but you might be 20 and totally in the right place mentally. We are all different and I think you are mature enough to do what you want if you are capable of dealing with any potential fall out.

 If there is one thing we have to accept is we cannot control life and the timing we have in our heads does not always match up to the reality. Sometimes opportunities do not come along at the right time but we should take them anyway as we all have to learn from our mistakes.

The other thing we have to remember is you are not a failure if you deviate from the predetermined path. For instance I originally applied to study Veterinary Science at uni and had dreamed of becoming a vet for a long time. I was a good candidate, my grades were good enough, I had done loads of work experience plus I grew up on a farm with a lifetime experience with animals. However after one interview I received no offers and it was probably one of the lowest points of my life. All around me my friends had their pick of 5 unis and I didn't even have one. I vividly remember the day I got my final rejection and when I told my friends I didn't get a single offer one of them replied "Yeah Amber, you think YOUR news is bad? I got rejected from Exeter today". I wanted to punch her as I knew she had 4 other offers from really good universities which included both of her top choices and had never had any intention of going to that uni in the first place. As I went to a highly competitive grammar school I was one of the few girls not to receive any offers and I had no clue what to do with my life.

But I had to pull myself back together and make some tough decisions. I've never been one for quitting and I desperately wanted to reapply. However there are only a handful of veterinary schools in the UK. Two of these are in Scotland and one is Cambridge and I didn't want to go to any of these. This only left with me with my 4 original choices (RVC, Nottingham, Liverpool and Bristol) and several of these were planning on raising their entry requirements or did not allow repeat applications. I decided that maybe this wasn't the career path for me and decided to change direction instead of giving up. The point is that this does not make me a failure just because I did not follow the expected path for me. Its made me who I am today and I do not regret the decision.

In conclusion: respect the opinions of those older and wiser than you. They probably do know better. But that isn't always the point. You have to learn your own way and we must be prepared to be flexible with our overall life plan as you never know whats going to happen. The right path for some is not always the right one for you. Know and trust yourself.

Also the book is a seriously good read. Check it out if you get bored ;)

Picture: Pinterest.

Things that have made me Happy this Week

Sunday, 1 March 2015


Its been a busy week this week what with juggling work and being at uni. My little blog has hit some small milestones this week as I reached my first viewing milestone. I also had someone tweet me with some positive feedback to say they really liked my weekly happiness posts. Now that made me happy!

Pulled BBQ Chicken
1. Having a nice nap. This is a seriously underrated past time that is only really acceptable if you are a toddler or a student. For some weird reason I’ve been really tired all week and I had a much needed afternoon nap. It made me feel so much better. I think I need to listen to my body on this one and accept that I need a little bit more sleep then I’ve been getting recently. Working early shifts for a few weekends in a row probably hasn’t helped as it doesn’t give me a chance to catch up. This magical nap left me feeling like a brand new person. If you feel like crying because you are too tired then I would suggest grabbing a nap when you can. 

Salted Caramel Milkshake in Hipster Mason Jar (note:fake drink rings haha)
2. Went with some of my old friends from halls to a new restaurant that’s opened up in Southampton called Shrimp and Burger. With that name the contents of the menu don’t hold many surprises as this is a burger bar. What makes it interesting is the fact it’s clearly trying to compete with the infamous 7Bone which in my opinion is both highly overrated and overpriced. If you are looking for the same hipster atmosphere as 7Bone but vastly superior quality food then look no further. I was extremely impressed with the value for money and the taste of the food. I ordered a Salted Caramel milkshake and a pulled chicken burger with fries. It was all delicious and the service was great. Plus you can actually get a table unlike in 7Bone where the staff are also exceptionally snotty. 

An exceptionally drunk pizza selfie after Wild Lime
3. This week was my friend Naomi’s 21st birthday and I met up with my girlies at Wild Lime to celebrate. Copious amounts of wine, cocktails and Prosecco were consumed and I had such a lovely time. I love spending time with these girls and its even better if theres an excuse to get dressed up involved. Happy Birthday Naomi! You are literally so adorable and I love you!

4. A few weeks ago I popped into my local Clinique counter to grab my free trial of their new Beyond Perfecting Foundation. As a massive fan of Clinique I am super keen to try anything new they bring out. I am very impressed with this foundation. I normally use their Superbalanced Foundation in Beige Chiffon as it gives a sheer coverage and is oil free. While I still love my Superbalanced, the advantage of the Beyond Perfecting is it offers heavier coverage for days when my skin is not looking so great. Plus you only have to use the tiniest amount so I think my free sample might last be a really long time.

5. This week my boyfriend and I had a super cosy night in with PJ’s, the duvet and Dominos two for Tuesday. Literally my idea of the perfect date which is tragic I know.

Its just too pretty
6. In my Pink Parcel which I wrote about last week there was a MUA eyeshadow palette in Romantic Effervesence. I’m in love with it and I wore it every day last week. The best thing about it is it only costs £4 and considering its price tag it is very high quality. I’ve got designer eyeshadow that does not stand up to this. As it costs so little it is definitely worth giving it a go as it’s great for everyday use.
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