2017 has been a momentous year for me. So much has happened that I never expected and there have been times that have severely tested my mental strength and resolve.

I'm actually quite sad that this year is over, but looking forward to what 2018 brings.

1. We bought our first house!

This is obviously the biggest and most important thing that has happened to me this year (just in case I haven't gone on about it enough yet on this blog). 

Owning my own home has been my number one goal for a very long time, so to finally achieve it feels amazing. I've written quite a lot on here about how it hasn't really sunk in yet that this space is now mine and I can do what I want with it, which I wasn't expecting to feel like. I thought it would me immediate and I would instantly feel like it was mine but its actually taking a long time.

I am loving buying all the little bits that make it ours (my bank balance is probably loving this a lot less) and seeing it start to come together. 

Without a doubt this is one of my proudest achievements ever as Jared and I have done this by ourselves after a lot of hard work. 

It is nice to finally be able to enjoy that hard work and sit back and relax in our own home.

2. I started a new job

I started 2017 determined to find myself a new job where I could push myself a bit harder and learn more about the industry I work in.

It took me a while to find somewhere that was the right fit, but I absolutely love my new job. My new role is more challenging and the company I now work for is keen for me to develop professionally which is all I ever wanted.

While it was a steep learning curve initially I feel that I have started to find my feet now and am looking forward to continuing this next year.

Timing wise, my new job wasn't brilliant as I signed the contract just days before we had our offer accepted on our new house. This complicated our mortgage application but it all worked out in the end so it was worth chancing it. 

3. Visiting Norway

It's hard to believe that this trip was already almost a year ago but I absolutely ADORED Norway. 

I've never visited a country before and thought 'Yep, I could live here pretty happily'. It was such an  incredible family holiday and we still talk about it all the time. 

Seeing the Northern Lights, going snowmobiling and husky sledding... all things I've always wanted to do. Not to mention Norway's incredible landscape. 

Now I want to go back and kayak under the Midnight Sun, see more of the fjords and experience the landscape in a different season. 

4. I wrote my first sponsored post

This year I wrote my first sponsored post as for the first time I was offered a collaboration that I was genuinely interested in. 

I've been writing this blog a long time and it was nice to see it finally pay off in some small way.

5. Completing our redecorating project

Buying a house has meant we have had to learn how to do many new things and that includes decorating. When we got the keys we decided to repaint the vast majority of the house.

A pretty ambitious project for two 23 year olds who have never done anything of the sort to complete on their own. 

It took us three weeks of every evening and weekend (plus a few days off work for Jared) to get it done but it was so worth it. 

The house now looks how we want it to and although we have a tight budget we have made it our own.

I'm really proud of how it looks and can't wait to continue improving the remaining rooms and garden next year.

6. The support from family and friends 

I have been absolutely blown away this year by the continuous support we have had from our family and close friends. Buying this house was the most stressful thing I've ever done and I could never have done it without their help.

My parents especially deserve a huge thank you as they supported me through all the ups and downs that happened over the six months it took from viewing the house to getting the keys.

On top of that they have very kindly donated to us all sorts of furniture and appliances, which has dramatically reduced how much we have had to buy.

In fact, all sorts of people came out of the woodwork to donate or very kindly buy us useful gifts for our new house. As a result we have bought hardly anything new and we are incredibly grateful to everyone who has helped us. 

If any of these people are reading this, thank you so much. It really has made all the difference to us and we've been overwhelmed by everyone's kindness. 

To quote Bridget Jones: An excellent years progress. 

Life After Graduation - Coping with life after leaving uni

We talk so much about how hard it is to leave home for the first time, learning to cope on your own and how to manage your own life. Struggling with life at uni is also widely talked about. Coping with exam stress, challenging modules, conflicting deadlines and managing to have a social life and keep your bills paid on time can get on top of people. Which is ok, we're only human and you were learning how to handle all of that for the first time.

What we don't talk about is coping with life once you've left uni. That for the first time in life the neat path of school > 6th form > uni no longer applies. You are staring your future in the face but you might as well be looking into a blank abyss.

In my blog series about Life After Graduation I've covered several different topics from how my own job hunting experience went, to tips on getting started with job searching if you're feeling overwhelmed as well as why I think its perfectly ok to not work in your degree field. If you read my post on how I found a job after uni you'll know that finding a job happened REALLY quickly for me. Which is great, I'm really grateful to have found a job so rapidly, but it also meant I had no time to process the enormous change that had happened in my life.

As I mentioned above we accept that GOING to uni is a huge change that people have a tough time adjusting to but we're less sure how to deal with someone who is struggling to find their feet again once they have that degree certificate.

While having a job gave my life structure to work around (which definetely helped) it meant I had no energy to focus on how I was feeling and how I was coping. In reality my life had just been turned upside down. After four years of living independently and being in charge of myself I was now living back at home with my parents, one of my sisters also graduated at the same time as me and Jared moved in with us as well. That's enough to knock anyone off kilter but I started a new job at the same time as well. It wasn't until I had been back home for a few months that I was able to admit to people that I was finding it hard.

And do you know what? It's ok to struggle but the only people who really get it are your fellow graduates who have experienced it too. I love my parents so much but they cannot really understand why I feel a bit trapped at home. They take this as I'm desperate to get away from them, not I just crave being in control of my own life again.

More than a year since graduation, life has settled down for me and I have come to accept my situation for what it is. So if you've just graduated (or know someone who has) these are my tips for navigating this massively understated period of change.

1. Take a short break.

I'm not talking about months of dossing around the house, but take a short period of time to unwind from the stress of your final months of uni. Use the time to relax and regroup and figure out your next step. Don't pressure yourself to make huge decisions, just decide what your initial move will be and that's it. If you've got the funds (unlikely but some do) take yourself off somewhere to get away from it all and gain some perspective on your situation.

As I've already mentioned I was working at my new job before I had even graduated so I didn't take the time to do this and I think it contributed massively towards me feeling very frazzled and burnt out in my first few months of working. If you are able to, take just a short period of time for yourself, because I wish I had.

2. Work on accepting your loss of independence.

Chances are you've moved back home with your parents. It's what a lot of young graduates do while looking for employment. While it is fantastic to have such a safety net (and I am forever grateful to my parents for allowing both Jared and I to move back here) it doesn't come without it's problems. Now is not the time to sink back into adolescence. If you want to get ahead in life continue to be as independent as possible under your parents roof. Clean up after yourself, do chores not because you were told to but because you can see they need doing, wash your own clothes and most importantly: pay your way. As soon as that first pay cheque comes in it's time to start paying your parents rent. Before that you should earn your keep by being even more helpful around the house.

I think it's important to pay rent for many reasons. First and foremost, you're an adult and it's not ok to expect a free ride from your parents. In addition contributing to the household encourages you to manage your finances responsibly. The most important reason though it to maintain that sense of yourself. The one who paid her bills on time and kept a roof over her head at uni. Don't let that version of you shrivel up so that you don't recognize her once you're ready to strike out on your own again.

Paying rent also helps your relationship with your parents as you are less of a burdensome child and more of a fellow adult. You are helping your parents share the load and in return you can respectfully ask that they allow you the freedom to continue being an adult. How much rent you pay is between you and your parents but it's essential to have open and honest conversations about it. It's also crucial to talk about the rules they expect you to follow (and for you to stick to them) but also how they can allow you to maintain as much independence as possible.

It's by no means easy (and this is coming from someone who resents anyone having control over my life, no matter how small) but over time I've come to accept that certain freedoms are no longer available. The trade off is I get a roof over my head for a lot less then I would be paying otherwise and never have to worry about the heating bill. To be honest, a lot of the freedoms I crave weren't available to me at uni anyway, because I lived with other people. Accepting it refocuses my energy into creating my own life without relying on others.

3. Make an effort to stay in touch with friends

I think this isn't something that dawns on people until they're actually weeks away from graduating, but seeing your friends once you've left uni is HARD. It requires time and effort (and a lot of train tickets) to see them. Chances are you're all scattered across the country (or the globe in some cases!) with various work and social commitments to keep track of. Finding a weekend to meet up is hard but well worth the effort and expense. When life is getting a bit much for you, hanging out with old friends who are in the same boat can really help. It helps you remember that you aren't alone, which is important because life immediately after graduation can be lonely. Especially if you're at home on your own all day.

You will make new friends as you establish your new life, but to start with you might find that you don't have many people to spend your free time with. For this I am immensely grateful that Jared has moved in with my family as he is my best friend so he's always here for me to hang out with. But as much as I love him he cannot substitute for my girlfriends indefinitely and for that I need to either get in the car or catch the train to see them. I'm always so glad I made the effort and I feel recharged for weeks after a catch up with them.

On top of that we make a serious effort to chat to each other on facebook very regularly which although isn't the same, helps us stay connected with each others lives. It's also a huge comfort to know that I can pick up the phone if I'm struggling and they're still there for me.

4. Make a structured plan for your day

If you're still looking for a job, then you must be strict with yourself and try to structure your day. Include time spent job hunting within that. It's better to apply yourself solidly for a short amount of time each day then to spend hours aimlessly browsing job adverts or staring blankly at a daunting looking grad scheme application. Doing a small amount daily will add up to a considerable amount over the course of a week. When you're not job hunting make sure you are strict with yourself about things like getting up and going to bed at the same time, eating sensibly and doing basic chores such as making your bed, taking a shower and getting dressed. Feeling like you have no direction in life is challenging enough without allowing yourself to slide into a poor state of health (be that mental or physical).

5. Find a productive task

If you're looking for a job, then finding productive ways to fill your hours not spent job hunting will really help you if you're feeling a little low after uni. This is an ideal time to do projects you've always needed the time for. A great one would be learning to drive (if you haven't already) as you know have the free time for lessons and it helps give you focus. Once you've passed not only are you able to add 'full clean driving license' to your CV but a whole other world of jobs opens up to you. Or you could task yourself with sorting through all of your stuff from uni and donating unwanted items to charity or selling them on ebay. You could volunteer for a cause that matters to you and put your skills to good use. Or you could even start a blog... It doesn't really matter what it is, it's just important to have something to do to prevent you from becoming apathetic by having something else to focus on. On top of that you're almost certain to improve your skills along the way too, which is  a win win.

6. Read some inspirational books

In our digitally switched on world we're finding it increasingly difficult to devote a chunk of time to reading. But is so good for you. Take the time to refresh your sense of purpose with something motivational. It could be an autobiography of someone you admire, or a book on mindfulness or one that teaches you how to start your own business. Keeping your head high and remembering to keep trying are really important in this awkward, transitional part of your life. Three personal favourites of mine are The Wrong Knickers by Bryony Gordon, #Girlboss by Sophia Amoruso and The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a F*ck by Sarah Knight.

7. Accept this phase for what it is

It's ok and pretty normal for this part of your life to be uncertain  and unpredictable. You are still getting started and its fine that you haven't got it figured out yet. Decide that you are going to buckle yourself in for the ride because the chances are you will experience a lot of highs and lows in the coming months. Your early twenties are a place of turbulence because you are figuring out which path to take. That's all ok and normal. Come to terms with it and you will be able to roll with the punches a lot better.

8. Nobody else has it all figured out either

Always remember that what you see online is other people's highlight reel. They often don't share the struggle or the insecurity as openly as they do their amazing work trip or the fancy cocktails they seem to drink every night of the week. Chances are you're guilty of it too. It's almost certain though that they are also struggling and trying to figure things out one step at a time, just like you are.

9. Don't neglect yourself

Although its important to work hard, take time to be nice to yourself. Keep up with your hobbies, spend time doing things you find relaxing, hang out with your friends and family. It's good to be ambitious but if you try to do too much you'll burn yourself out. 

10. Strive for your independence

During this period of your life if you're not sure what direction to head in, then having this as your goal won't steer you far wrong. Just remember that independence has a different meaning for everyone. To me I think it means not having to rely on other people financially and being able to have a place of my own. To a friend of mine, independence means being able to work for yourself, anywhere in the world and not being constrained by your location or the company you work for. Another friend wishes to be able to research what interests her without being tied into a degree course. Whatever it means for you, make sure that you're constantly striving for it and that it shapes your decisions. 

Did you struggle with life after uni? Are you still adjusting a year later like I am? Or are you going through this now? Let me know if you have any tips that worked for you!

Life After Graduation Blog Series:

Post 1: My job hunting experience

Post 2: Starting your job search

Post 3: Why its ok if you don't want to work in your degree field

Life After Graduation - Why it's ok if you don't want to work in your degree field

So if you're coming to the end of five years of training to be a doctor because it has been your single dream and ambition since you were eight years old this might not be the post for you. But for those of us who either don't want to work in our degree field (whether you enjoyed your degree or not)  or those who can't find work in our degree field then read on. Not only are you far from alone but it's ok to make your peace with it. 

18 is so young to decide what you want to do with your life and what direction you want to take. 18 year old me didn't have a clue about anything and least of all about myself. If I had known about the hidden skills I have now I would have possibly chosen a different path. However there is no point focusing on this, you can't change the past. I do suspect though, that those skills that have come to the fore since I've been working have in fact been developed through my degree without me even knowing about it. So it doesn't mean your degree was pointless.

On that note learning is never a waste of time and I try to be grateful for all the opportunities my degree has given me. It has shaped me and challenged me in ways I never knew it would and has forged me into a person I would never have believed I was capable of becoming. The skills you have gained may not be immediately obvious such as the ability to cope under pressure (remember that dissertation deadline) or to handle difficult questions from superiors (such your viva). You also never know when the knowledge you've gained might come in useful in the future. 

Learning how to learn is a skill in itself and if there is only one skill you gain from uni its this. Uni is sink or swim and if you can't keep up you get left behind. You pick up new skills quickly once you get to grips with that. One of my modules at uni during my masters year had us learning new, industry standard software each week with an assessment the following week on how well we had used it to present our data and analysis. Each piece of software was complex, with each being less intuitive and user friendly than the last. We would have a short session with PhD students demonstrating how to use the software, then we either collected the data (depending on the task) or were given the data to clean, plot and analyze. If you didn't pick up how to use it during that session you were screwed. When I started my first job I picked up their computer systems really easily. During my training I repeatedly asked my boss to let me learn quicker and to move on to new stuff. I was confident on what I had already learnt and I was consistently getting it right without help. She repeatedly told me no, that learning new software would confuse me. When I finally did come to learn it I found I was right, I could have learnt it months previously and my boss was projecting her own struggles to learn new things onto me. It was one of the reasons why I ultimately looked for another job. The lesson was valuable though, I knew I wasn't being pushed hard enough and the skills I had gained at uni made me confident enough to say so.  

Uni teaches you that learning new things and being challenged is part of life. It teaches us the value of hard work and that if you aren't brave enough to admit you don't understand something then people will assume you do. Doing that will always come back to bite you. The nature of researching subjects in depth teaches you to not accept something as true just because things rarely have a straightforward answer. You learn to weigh up the pros and cons of peoples arguments and to analyze which one you think has the more convincing evidence. You learn that group work is a nightmare of clashing egos and personalities. You realise that field work and being away from home for long periods of time is not all the fun and games its cracked up to be. You learn things about yourself but you also slowly figure out how to work with other people. All skills that are essential to hold down any job. 

On top of all of this, knowledge is power. You never know when the stuff you actually learnt about during your degree is going to come in useful. You might end up working in the industry in a way you hadn't previously considered, but your base knowledge underpins all of the stuff you learn in your role. You might win your team a crucial round at a pub quiz. You might correct someone who is talking about something they don't really understand and help them to understand it better. Knowing about things will always help you in some way, even if it isn't right now.

As you graduate and start to gain real work experience each role you have will help shape you in its own way. You will gain more experience and more knowledge with time. You may sit some industry qualifications or you might prove yourself to be a good leader. I bet you developed the skills that helped you pass those exams or to manage projects at uni. Each role will help you move forwards as you look to build upon what you already have. If you're trying to find a role within the industry you studied at uni, then each position you have will give you more experience that should make you a stronger candidate, over graduates with no experience. Everyone needs basic skills such as customer service, answering the phone, responding to emails etc. The more you develop the basic stuff, the better chance you have of breaking into the industry you want to work in.

It's also ok to change your mind. We live in a culture where we are all supposed to just magically figure out our calling and know what we want to do forever and ever. In reality as we grow up we change and so do our passions. A career is meant to be a journey, not a fixed path that you are set upon. It's normal to dart in a direction for a while and then either continue if you're enjoying it or find a different opportunity if you're not. 

I struggled throughout uni with peoples expectations of the field of work I would go into when I was finished and I still get comments about it now. I sometimes feel like people might think I'm a failure and sometimes they make those feelings known. People are often incredulous that someone with a masters degree in something doesn't want to work in it. Well four years is a long time to study something and by the end of it I had made my peace with the fact although I loved the subject and found it hugely interesting it wasn't where I wanted to work. Realising that I have the power to take my life in the direction I chose is empowering. I don't have to obey these people, they're only voicing their opinion, it doesn't mean I have to listen to it. 

Overall I chose to work in something that I find interesting and not because I think it will impress someone else or have made my degree 'worthwhile'. I  think you should do the same and make what you want out of your degree, whatever subject it was in.

Life after Graduation - Starting your Job Search

Few things strike fear into the hearts of recent graduates more than the words JOB HUNTING. So scarily adult. You've just turned your whole life upside down and you're got no idea where to even start because they don't teach you this stuff at school. For a lot of people this will be the first time they've ever actually applied for a job. This was true even for me and I had worked thoughout my degree by finding work through people I knew. I'd never written a CV, looked at a job advert or been to an interview and yet I actually found a job pretty easily. More about my job hunting story here.

While I can't promise you'll find a job straight away here are some easy things you can do right now which will help get you started. As everyone who has ever embarked on a difficult task will know, starting is often the hardest part and once you have accomplished that it is easier to continue with the next steps.

1. Consider what your expectations are.

Are you prepared to be flexible in the area you want to work in? Or are you prepared to be flexible on location? If you can answer yes to either of those questions then you will find it a lot easier to get a job, simply because there are more options open to you. If you can answer yes to BOTH (which a lot of new graduates can) then job hunting suddenly doesn't seem so daunting, because they're are a myriad of jobs out there.  The world is not the same as it was in 2008 and graduate unemployment is not the dire picture it was a few years ago. Yes there will always be fierce competition for the top jobs, but they are not the only ones out there.

I was not prepared to move away from home (because of trying to save for a house deposit) but I was open minded when it came to what type of job I was looking for.

It's also worth baring in mind that your first job is unlikely to be your forever job and it's ok to find something that suits you for now.  If you've never had a job before, any position at all will help you gain valuable skills like talking to people on the phone, or helping customers face to face. Then you can build on those skills to find your next role. In my experience it is far easier to find employment if you are already employed (bit of a catch 22 for recent grads I know) so if an opportunity comes your way, take it. Even it it's not the dream grad job you had in mind, you will be better placed for the next grad scheme cycle if you've gained more real life working experience.It's unlikely to be the best job in the world, but its better to be out there earning money and skills while you look for your next role. Once you know what you're prepared to compromise on and you accept your first role might not be the best you ever have you'll be better positioned to take the next steps.

2. Update your LinkedIn profile.

If you don't have one, then make one! Add all of your old connections from uni and any colleagues from previous jobs. Update your qualifications and add that you are looking for work in the relevant sector. This is important for three reasons:

1. A lot of recruitment agencies find people through LinkedIn. A solid profile means that they are more likely to be able to find you in the first place as well as suss out the necessary info about you to figure out if you would be a good march for the job they have in mind.

2. You can apply for jobs through LinkedIn and you are able to get a feel for the company by looking at who already works there and what sort of experience they have.

3. When you have an interview lined up you can check out the person interviewing you and find out more about them (you can do this in private mode if you want).

This is such a simple one and can really help you feel like you've made a positive step forward.  

3. Write your CV

If you've never written one before or your current one needs sprucing up then head over to Monster. I've found they have the best info to help you and the most professional looking templates. Using one can really help you get started if you're currently staring at a blank screen on Microsoft Word or it can help you polish up your existing version. You can always adapt it at a later stage but it always helps to have something to get you going in the first place.

4. Post your CV online.

This is absolutely crucial. When you are browsing websites for jobs, make an account and post your CV online. The big three to absolutely make sure you have a presence on are Indeed, Reed and Monster. Also don't forget to look at more local sources such as your local newspapers or radio shows website. Not only do they often post adverts from smaller companies but you can often upload your CV too and its a cert that all the jobs on there will be local. 

If you do this then (and your CV is well written) you will often find that the job offers start coming to you! A call from a recruitment agency is always welcome as they sometimes have positions that haven't been widely advertised and if the one they have contacted you about doesn't float your boat you can always ask about other roles they are recruiting for. Always cultivate your contacts with them as you may find they contact you again at a later date if they find another position and your name comes to mind.

5. Consider Temping 

If you've just graduated and have no clue what you want to do, signing up to a local temping agency can be a great way to get going. The plus side is you get to try lots of different roles and get a feel for what area of work might suit you. You will also build loads of skills from each role and companies often take on temps for full time positions if you prove yourself to be capable.Temping agencies are always on the look out for people due to the fact people come and go all the time so chances are they might have something suitable for you. Obviously the downside is the work can be for varying lengths of time and it can be unpredictable but if you can be flexible then it can be a great way to sample lots of different positions and find out more about yourself. It also beats lurking about the house all day doing nothing and listening to your parents complain about you not having a job yet! Other options if you're struggling include looking for part time roles or volunteering. Although unlikely to pay what you were hoping it can be a fantastic way of gaining more skills which will help you move onto your next role. 

Life After Graduation Blog Series:

Post 1: My job hunting experience