If you had asked me how I felt about graduating this time last year I would have probably just shrugged and reeled off some vague answer about getting a job and figuring it out when it happened. Inside though I was losing my mind with panic.
Graduating from uni and leaving the education system is terrifying when your life has always been clearly mapped out for you with a simple path to follow. You go to school, then sixth form and then onto uni. While changing between them was scary to start with, the familiar patterns of progressing from one year to the next with the constant routine of work, revision and exams soon make them all blend together. Yes your first few weeks at uni were probably quite a shock but the academic work is essentially what you've been doing for over a decade. By the time you're in your final year at uni you are quite the seasoned pro at the education malarkey.
But the idea of leaving it? Mind blowing.
And I was no exception, I was just as scared as everyone else. But just like everyone else, I got through it and I'm still here.
It's been 6 months since I graduated now and I've learnt a lot in that time, in ways that I wasn't expecting to. I experienced some of the things I feared and while some of them were hard, others turned out to be ok in the end.
1. I feel more like I'm my own person. Considering we're widely told that university is the best time of our lives and that we should make the most of it while it lasts, it isn't paradise for everyone. While I enjoyed my 4 years at uni immensely, in hindsight I can recognise that there were some really tricky parts. I had to take modules I struggled with, go on lengthy field trips I didn't want to go on and research things that didn't interest me just because the lecturer decided that's what they wanted us to write about. While these are all excellent life skills (we all have do things we don't want to) now I get to choose what field of work I want to be in, I choose where I take my trips and I choose to learn about the things that I want to. This level of freedom was quite mind blowing when you're used to being told what to do by teachers all the time. I get to be in charge of my own life and decide what direction I want to take.
2. Not having as many friends after uni can be lonely and it's something you should prepare yourself for. At uni you're surrounded by your friends. In first year they live just down the hall and in the years after that you probably moved in with them. You spend all day hanging out with your friends on your course and your free time is spent with friends from clubs and societies.
Its also incredibly easy to make friends at uni, after all you have common ground with everyone because you all chose the same university to attend.
Once you leave though, your friends are scattered around the country with various commitments of their own and it can become really tough to see them. Not only that but your support network is now hundreds of miles away.
I don't really have many old friends from back home to hang out with and I'm not ashamed to admit I haven't made any new yet friends either. It has been a bit of a lonely time for me but its early days. Trying to forge a new life doesn't happen overnight and my friendships are having to adapt with it. But I have learnt I can survive without them being in the room next door. I now appreciate the time I do get to spend with them a whole lot more.
3. Any port in a storm. Its a thought worth bearing in mind. Every headline seems to be full of depressing news for young people - less opportunities, lower wages and rising unemployment.
But it doesn't have to be this way. Sometimes what needs to change is your mindset and expectations. If you lower them a little you might be pleasantly surprised and find that job hunting isn't always hard.
Your first job probably isn't going to be anything to shout about anyway, so if something is offered to you, take it. Even if it isn't the dream job you will learn a heck of a lot.
It can be difficult to get a job without experience. So when a chance to gain some comes your way don't turn it down because you think it's beneath you. Going to uni and getting a degree doesn't make you that special these days.
Every job you ever have is likely going to involve answering the phone, talking to customers, handling queries and sending letters or emails. Whether you work in a tiny shop or you're CEO of a major company, everyone has to engage with other people. It's the nature of business.
If you can't even prove on your CV that you can do some basic level stuff like that then your degree is worthless to a lot of employers. They're looking for real world experience in handling the 'small stuff' so if you keep getting rejected look for something less prestigious and get some solid skills under your belt.
The next time you're asked in an interview to give an example of how you handled a difficult customer you will have endless answers to choose from.
4. Having a job isn't that hard. If your course at uni was fairly rigorous and you worked hard chances are you're already in a pretty good routine and mind set to handle a 9-5. I always feared actually having to get a job in case I wasn't very good at it but if you're prepared to learn then it really isn't that hard at all. After all you've just spent a number of year learning HOW to learn so chances are you'll pick things up pretty quickly and soon get into the swing of things.
5. I actually have less money to spend. This is something friends and family are struggling to grasp. I had a job at uni and worked a lot on top of student loans and grants so I actually had a fairly healthy amount of money to live on. But back then I wasn't saving for anything, so all my disposable income was mine to spend on whatever I wanted. I worked hard to earn that money and balancing a job and a degree (read my post about that particular minefield) at the same time isn't easy despite what people might say. If you read my post on goals for this year you'll know I'm trying to save for a deposit for a house. So now I have to live frugally and I'm not able to splash my cash. This was a bit of a reality check for me because I always imagined once I had a job I'd have loads of money. The reality is a little different. If I want to regain the independent life I had at uni then I need to save to buy my own house. I had to decide if I want that more than I want to buy new things I don't really need.
6. My free time is my own. This was something that I never really considered before. I don't have a deadline coming up, I don't have revision to be doing and I don't have a dissertation I should be writing. I go to work and when I come home I don't have more work that I need to do. I can do what I enjoy with this time, no guilt required. After a lifetime of homework and revision its quite a revelation.
7. I no longer feel like a child. This is something that happens at a different rate for everyone but uni has equipped me to deal with adult things bit by bit. Registering at the doctor, looking for a house to rent, managing my money - all things that seemed like a big deal at first but are no drama now. For me, uni was an 'intro to adulting' which meant that after 4 years I left feeling like I could handle myself. Now that I have a job and I make my own money I feel like I've actually come to terms with the fact everything I need doing has to be handled by me. Its liberating because I get to be in control of my own life.
8. Life becomes more stable. The one thing about work (for most people at least) is that it's fairly constant. For me uni was full of peaks and troughs. I'd feel on top of the world after handing in a tricky piece of work and hit rock bottom staring at a practice exam paper the night before the exam realising I didn't know half the module. Uni is constantly changing and your work load is dynamic. My routine is much more solid now I have a job and this gives me structure to work around. Its surprising how much more I get done because I procrastinate less.
9. I'm way happier. Going back to the whole 'uni is the best time of your life' thing from the first point, I've found this isn't necessarily true. Overall my life has improved massively since I've graduated and although it hasn't been without its challenges, it's still been a change for the better. I didn't realise how anxious uni was making me feel. I constantly felt ever so slightly sick whenever I thought about how much work I should be doing. I didn't see how much it was affecting me until the feeling was lifted. I no longer carry around a huge amount of stress and worry. I am actually making progress towards my overall life goals now that I have my own money and I feel happier as a result.
Overall leaving uni wasn't as hard or as scary as I thought it would be. If you're at uni and about to graduate I hope this helps. Yes it will still be scary. Change is scary there's no getting away from it, but hopefully you might now see that it can change your life for the better as well.
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